Seeking the Fae (Daughter of Light Book 1) Read online

  Mara sighed. “It was her first time. We’ll try again in twelve hours’ time. Her mother’s being laid to rest. The elders have called for her.”

  Trissa looked like she wanted to argue, but simply nodded her head, stepping past me and going deeper into the house.

  The sending off was the most beautiful part of the celebration of life. All of the white tea lights, the invocation of the elements … I wouldn’t miss it for the world.

  I bowed my head in shame. “I’ll do better next time,” I told Mara, because I had a sneaking suspicion she knew I dropped the ball.

  “Your mom botched her first job too.” She winked as we started to walk into the dining room.

  My eyebrows raised. “Really?”

  Elle stood there silently watching me, but hadn’t said a word.

  Mara nodded, a wry grin pulling at her lips. “She walked in, saw a group of Sons, and ran out screaming. Came back crying and said she wanted to quit.”

  Whoa. That did NOT sound like my mom. “She was twenty-two years old, new to all of this, and terrified,” Mara added.

  My eyes widened. I didn’t know my mom was so young when she started, basically my age. She had me young, at age twenty, declaring on my fifteenth birthday that she would stop aging because she’d gotten her first gray hair that day. I smiled at the memory. The mom I knew would take shit from no one. It was kind of cool to think of her new and starting out like me.

  Reaching out, Mara smoothed my hair. “She didn’t want to rob you of your childhood. To throw all of this at a teenager’s feet.”

  I understood now. As much as I might not agree fully, I understood.

  Mara motioned to the bedroom I had slept in last night. “Go and change for your mom’s ceremony. There are clothes in the closet.”

  The second I stepped into the bedroom at Mara’s to change for my mother’s ceremony, Elle turned to face me, shutting the door behind her.

  “Is there something you want to tell me?” she asked, folding her arms across her chest.

  I gulped. “About?”

  Shit. She knew. How?

  Elle stepped closer to me, lowering her voice. “About the black-winged Son of mother fucking Darkness who, I don’t know, looked like your fucking soulmate.” Her eyes were wide and bugging out of her head.

  My hand flew out and clamped her mouth shut. “Shhh,” I scolded her, pulling my hand back. “Did you see?”

  She nodded. “I got worried when you were taking so long, started peeking in windows.”

  My stomach tightened. “Did Triss?”

  She shook her head. “I diverted her.”

  Relief crashed through me. “Thanks.”

  She shook her head, rubbing at her temple. Her golden-brown wings flitted about behind her in anxiety. “Lily … those guys are scary … like evil.”

  “I know! It’s not like I did anything to make it happen,” I snapped, feeling like she was making this my fault.

  Her face fell, compassion replacing what previously looked like condemnation. “I know … I just. You didn’t like … give up the crystal, right? You fought him for it? And he won?”

  Shit. So she must have just seen the blue lightshow and not what happened after he put me in the closet.

  I nodded. “He’s strong. He … someone else walked in and there were two of them and yeah, they overpowered me.” I wasn’t yet ready to admit the truth to my best friend.

  Fuck. Why hadn’t I stabbed him? What was wrong with me? My entire homeland was dying and I let him just take the crystal back.

  Elle nodded. “Okay, just … remember what’s important … saving Faerie.”

  I returned her nod, suddenly feeling sick to my stomach. The only person in the world I wanted to talk to about this and ask advice from was dead, and I felt so very alone.

  An hour later, I was dressed in all white, standing next to my best friend and laying my mother to rest in front of our entire village. People had come in from the outskirts and farmlands to pay their respects to the elder seeker. Back before Faerie fell into darkness and our queen was slain, the seekers served her majesty, bringing back important objects and relics that would help win wars or heal people. Being a seeker was a great honor, and we were well respected members of the village.

  Indra wore an all-white gown, the hem of which were soaked by the river as she stood up to her ankles in the water. My mother’s limp form floated magically in the air before her. She was draped in white silk, with a giant clear crystal over her abdomen where her mortal injury was.

  “Violet, Daughter of Kari, we release your body back to the Earth so that your soul may fly free in the upper realms of the dead.”

  “Fly free, Violet,” the crowd chanted, and a sob formed in my throat.

  Fly free, Mom. Fly free.

  The other three elders surrounded my mom and let their magic flow from their palms, blue, orange, green, and white. It was beautiful. They guided my mother’s body over the lapping waves and then finally set her into the most turbulent part of the river.

  “We are grateful for your service to our lands and our people,” Indra told my mother softly.

  “We are grateful,” the Fae repeated as they dropped my mother’s body into the ocean and the crystal weighed her down, sinking slowly, slowly, into the water.

  I couldn’t hold it in any longer, I couldn’t be strong. I was a fucking weak ass twenty-year-old girl who wanted her mom and I didn’t care. Tears sprang from my eyes and I burst into sobs, collapsing on my knees.

  It was done. She was gone. Never to be seen again. The waters would take her body deep under the river, under the protection dome, away from here where she would cease to be anything but food for the water creatures. Back into the circle of life.

  Elle’s hand was the first to touch my shoulder. Then another and another. My fellow women surrounded me with love and compassion and it only made the tears fall faster. This was my favorite part about being Fae. Something I rarely saw the humans do in my many visits to Earth over the last two decades. This community of togetherness. When one grieved, we all grieved. If someone needed food, or care, or anything, you needed not even ask. It was given. The Fae were a beautiful people and I was proud to be a part of this special place, a place that Earth would never be like.

  A place Liam could never comprehend.

  I don’t know where that thought came from, but it was over as soon as it arrived. The people began to chant my mother’s name, and the music started.

  “The grieving is over,” Hana, the village seamstress, told me. “Now we must celebrate.”

  Our celebrations of life were short in the grieving and crying, and long in the dancing, laughing, and telling of stories. It was the way things were done, and although some might see it as a bit insensitive, I was grateful when the women pulled me from the beach and started to tell stories of my mother.

  “I’ll never forget your parents’ wedding night,” Maye, one of the village bakers, told me, linking arms with me as we walked to the band that was playing. Tomas had his tree horns out and his twin brother was banging some gourds in an upbeat tune. They were no Bob Dylan, but they’d do.

  “Eww, please don’t tell me about their wedding night,” I joked, wiping my eyes and smiling. I’d heard this story before but never tired of it.

  “I wanna hear,” Trissa said behind me, and I was startled by her voice. She never came to these things. She didn’t believe in the upper realms or the gods or any of that stuff. “I’ll make a pretty fertilizer one day,” she would always say.

  Maye grinned. “So I’d stitched her a beautiful lingerie gown, and assuming they would be busy the rest of the night, I went home and started getting ready for bed…”

  I beamed. The story was actually hilarious. Even more funny when my mom told it.

  “We were next-door neighbors and their house only had one bathroom,” Maye told the group that had gathered. Half of the people looked confused as to why Maye would be talking about th
e bathroom, but Elle and I started to erupt into giggles.

  Maye dramatically puts her hands out. “It’s midnight! I’m just dozing off thinking how lovely the ceremony was and I hear … bang, bang, bang, on my door.”

  All of the Fae gathered around looking serious. It only served to make Elle and I laugh harder.

  Maye walked around the center of the circle that had broken out around her. “I rush downstairs, thinking my roof must be on fire, and there’s Violet!”

  Silence. She had everyone’s attention. “I looked down at her and realize she’s red faced and holding her bum. She says three words to me. ‘One. Bathroom. Looseberries.’”

  Elle and I burst into laughter with the rest of the surrounding Fae, and tears leaked from my eyes. My mom spent her wedding night on Maye’s toilet. The baker was still learning, and made gooseberry pie with looseberries instead, known to have a laxative effect. The entire town had diarrhea that night except Maye, who never cared for gooseberry pie.

  I was glad she told the story. It made me miss my mom in a good way. “You think she’s up there with my dad?” I asked Maye suddenly, looking up at the stars. My dad died during the Dark War when I was two and I didn’t remember him. I only had a few pictures.

  Maye walked over and cupped my face in her hands. “If there’s one thing I know, it’s that those two are together, watching over you.”

  The tears were back as she pulled me into a hug and I let her hold me. Maye had been like a grandmother to me. She would rock me to sleep many nights when my mom was off working. As she gave me a huge tight hug, I just felt like everything was going to be alright. I would never be alone. Not in Faerie. Not with Maye, Elle, Trissa, Tomas, and everyone else looking out for me.

  I suddenly felt guilty that I’d let the crystal go so easily, that I hadn’t fought for it. Clearly that dude wasn’t my soulmate, it was some weird … magic trick or something. Either way, Faerie needed that crystal and I wouldn’t let them down.

  Maye released me and I squeezed her hand, spinning to find Trissa and Elle and tell them I wanted to go back in and find that crystal. But instead I slammed right into Indra.

  “Oh, I’m so sorry.” I reeled back, cheeks pink.

  You weren’t supposed to touch the elders. Not without being invited to. They were the closest thing we had to a holy person or queen.

  She smiled down at me, forgiving. “I didn’t mean to startle you. I hoped we could have a word?”

  Her face pinched with anxiety and I nodded, following her as she led me away from the group. When we were well away from the people of Faerie and had reached Summerset Park, she took a seat on the willow bench.

  I sat next to her, waiting for her to speak. She just breathed slowly, watching the celebration of life for my mother in the distance.

  “Is everything okay?” I finally asked. “I mean … if this is about the crystal. I’ll do better next time it’s just that—” She put up a hand and stopped me from speaking.

  “There is something I was vague about before and I would like to be more clear on now.” Her voice cracked a little with emotion.

  My heart hammered in my chest as I prepared myself for her to say something crazy. I wasn’t sure I could take anymore truth bombs. “What … is it?”

  I was racking my brain, trying to think what this could be about.

  “You asked me where the Sons of Darkness came from and I didn’t answer.”

  My whole body stiffened. Liam. He popped into my mind and my chest ached, but I promptly shook it off.

  “One of them had … Faerie wings. Like mine … but black, oily,” I told her.

  Liam. That name was seared into my brain.

  She nodded, taking a deep breath. “The Sons of Darkness are halflings. They are the product of our mistakes during the Dark War.”

  The lower part of my jaw unhinged at her words. Halflings? I didn’t know what that was, but I could guess…

  “Product of the Dark War?” I needed to hear her say it.

  She sighed. “Our people … took human lovers and the Sons of Darkness are the result.”

  I knew it! I burst up from the bench, unable to keep still any longer. “They’re half Fae!” I hissed.

  Her lips turned in a frown. “Sort of yes. At first we thought it would be okay. We could let the halflings with human mothers stay on Earth, and the halflings with Fae mothers stay here. The human mothers wouldn’t see past the illusion and so no harm would be done. They wouldn’t even know they had magical children.”

  I shivered. Can you imagine a five-year-old looking in the mirror and seeing black wings or horns and no one else could see it? Or craving blood? It would make you think you were insane.

  She fiddled with her hands. “We quickly realized that wouldn’t work. And we noticed that only males were being born. Something about the genetics never favored females in the womb. We don’t know why.”

  “What happened?” I needed to sit down or I was going to faint. Liam was a fucking halfling. He was part Fae. Did that make him my soulmate for real? I mean, it was plausible, right?

  Holy fuck.

  “The halfling children started to be born here and on Earth…” Her voice tightened with emotion. “It was okay for a little while and then … the halflings on Earth got sick. We learned that without the energy of Faerie or the crystals, they … died.”

  I felt sick to my stomach. Halflings or not, they were our people. “How many?”

  She looked confused.

  “How many died?” I pressed her.

  “Hundreds.”

  Oh God. “But the ones that lived here? They were okay?”

  Indra nodded. “For a time, but the Winter King, Cypress, had laid with a human and his child was one of the ones that died on Earth.”

  I squirmed in my seat. We used to have a full court. King Cypress of Winter, and Queen Isana of Summer, were our main rulers and lived at opposite ends of Faerie. Then there was princess Daphne of Spring, my court, and Prince Teek of Fall. It kept checks and balances intact.

  “He stole the crystals, didn’t he?” I just had a feeling.

  She nodded. “King Cypress loved his human, and she couldn’t come live here, so he took one of the crystals and gave it to her, to keep their next child safe.”

  My eyes widened. “Next child?”

  Indra nodded. “They had another. And the king let word spread that you could keep your halfling child alive on Earth, if only you stole one of the crystals from the Tree of Life.”

  Oh no.

  “Queen Isana sensed a rebellion and immediately put out an invitation to all halflings and their human mothers to come live in Faerie,” Indra stated.

  I sagged with relief. That was a really good idea. It would keep the crystals here and no more deaths. Indra fell quiet again; her breath hitched.

  “Well, surely that fixed things!” I couldn’t bear to hear anymore but I had to.

  Indra shook her head. “It did not. Unfortunately, the human mothers could not spend more than a week here without getting sick.”

  Oh gods.

  “They had to go back…” Indra didn’t need to finish. I knew.

  “They stole the crystals to keep their children alive,” I stated. It didn’t sound so bad. I mean, it was bad, our whole fucking world crashed down, but I couldn’t really blame them. A mother would do anything to keep their child alive and not be separated from them. This was so far off base from what we learned in school it wasn’t even funny. Lies. We were told lies.

  “That night, all twelve crystals were taken. Such greed, they didn’t even leave one, let alone half. The entire genocide of our people…” A sob lodged in her throat as she paused a moment to compose herself. “A billion Fae died that night, the water rose, the earth shook, and a fire lit all of Summer, while frost took over Winter. Our entire realm just … broke.”

  My throat tightened with emotion as a tear rolled down my cheek. “How was this one part saved?” I gestured around m
e.

  Indra grinned, wiping a tear from her cheek. “Your mother. She chased down one of the Fae and stole back one single crystal, which was enough at that time to hold this small space.”

  Mom. In that moment I was so proud. My mom saved Faerie…

  “Why don’t you tell people?”

  She squirmed. “Some are old enough to remember. But I guess we all agreed it was a dark time and we didn’t want to relive our mistakes. We didn’t want future generations to live in fear or repeat what we did.”

  Never lie with a human. It was our cardinal rule and now I understood why.

  “Why tell me?” I mean, I guess I knew the answer. Because I was all wrapped up in it now.

  Indra turned to me, her orange hair glowing in the moonlight. “Because the Winter King now leads the Sons of Darkness. We think he’s still out there, gathering up all the crystals on Earth.”

  My heart hammered in my chest. The Winter King was alive? I assumed he escaped with his human lover and child and … died or something.

  I gasped. “The crystals … keep him alive.”

  She nodded. “And your mother found something out before she died … something … unpleasant.”

  I wasn’t sure how much more information I could take.

  “What is it?” I gulped.

  Indra reached out and clasped my hand in hers. “I don’t know. She didn’t have time to tell us. Did she tell you?”

  Tell me? I shook my head. “No. She just told me how much she loved me.” I tried to replay that night in the bathtub, but didn’t want to for fear of having a breakdown.

  Indra nodded, patting my hand.

  “If he got all the crystals from Faerie … then our village would fall and we would all die. That would mean the Winter King and his Sons of Darkness could … live on Earth forever?”

  Indra simply nodded. “He’s powerful enough.”

  Holy mother of Faerie, this was so much worse than I thought. Anger rose up in my chest, making it hard to breathe. “You should have told me sooner. I haven’t been trained properly for this. We need more warriors, more seekers. I can’t—”